There Once Was a Priest from Nantucket ...

Even if you or your loved ones didn't have your private parts touched by a priest when you were kids, you no doubt have heard about the amazing number of Roman Catholic priests who have sexually molested children. In fact, you may have read about it right here on this blog!

Lest you still think that the Vatican was/is covering up these abuses, you should know they commissioned a million dollar study at the John Jay School of Criminal Justice to explain it all to you. Oh, and they gave them all the numbers and data for the investigation, but we are absolutely positive that did not bias the report.

The results are in, boys and girls!

The reason those priests ordained in the 1940s and 1950s had a penchant for young folks is because of the social upheaval of the 1960s. Yes, you see they hadn't been trained as it were to lead a celibate life so when everyone was smoking doobie and participating in crazy orgies on just about every street corner, they went after children for their personal sexual liberation.

Right.

This argument makes no sense whatsoever. If it was really the sexual revolution that turned grown men into drooling messes, wouldn't they just have gone after people their own ages with whom to have their own personal love-ins and not with children?

Undoubtedly the reason for celibacy which became de rigeur in the Church in the 12th century, was so that the church's hierarchy could not pass on the land they owned to their offspring. Things were getting pretty messy in the medieval church.

Seems a little hard to believe that in the ensuing seven hundred years seminaries didn't develop some sort of a training manual on how to lead a celibate life and what to do when confronted by a society that rubs your nose in its fornication.

Maybe we just heard about priestly paedophilia for the first time in the 1960s because dirty little secrets were finally being discussed openly.

As for this new report, let's roll it and smoke it.