Hallelujah!

As you may have heard, the Republican National Convention is being held this week in Tampa, Florida and a big ol' tropical storm named Isaac was headed right for it!

According to Rev. Jesten Peters who was interviewed by the Christian Broadcasting Network, Isaac was rebuffed by all the prayers that were said.

Of course, now Isaac is on track to pummel New Orleans on the seventh anniversary of Hurricane Katrina doing just that, but of course New Orleans is a godless mess of a city not unlike Sodom so they're on their own.

Voodoo Dat?

Okay, I am officially starting a rumor a/k/a I am channelling Pat Robertson.

January 12th : Horrific earthquake in Haiti, which is, as you know, where the populace sold their souls to the Debbil so that Napoleon would leave. Or whatever.

February 7th: New Orleans Saints win their first Super Bowl championship in their first Super Bowl appearance. Ever.

Coincidence? I think not.

This is the circle of life, people! And there is an apocolyptic battle going on between good and evil and it's all because of those damned semi-French people.

Haiti ... New Orleans ... basically settled by the same sort of folks ... Creoles. They learn how to make jambalaya and cast spells using voodoo. They also think nothing of exposing their breasts.

So we have Hurricane Katrina sent by Jebus to flatten New Orleans, followed years later (but only a blink in heaven time) by an earthquake sent to flatten Port-au-Prince, followed by a victory for the football team from the aforementioned city hit by Katrina.

Yes, yes, we are witness to this! Amen! The south is getting hit with snowstorms this winter because of the increase in the volitility of the battle of good versus evil.

Be afraid. Be very afraid.

Note to NOLA: Shootings Bad for Tourism

Love the tights!

Here we have the city of New Orleans, Louisiana, still staggering to get back on its feet so it can climb up on its unicycle, and what happens in the middle of Mardi Gras 2009? Seven people, including a baby, get shot! Not to mention the shootings that occurred just barely into Ash Wednesday and last Friday.

Not good, people!

There's not enough booze in the world to make a person not care that he or she has just been hit by a bullet. Nope. Not enough beads, not enough hedonism, not enough anything to make shootings okay.

So, pull it together. Otherwise we may stop caring if you ever recover from Katrina.

In Case Your Tuesday Wasn't Phat Enough

It may thrill you, as it did me, to know that Val Kilmer was crowned Bacchus in the 41st Parade of the same name in New Orleans.

This is the first thing that he has actually done in quite some time, I understand, although recently he said he was 'thinking' about running for Governor of New Mexico next year.

Sometimes I think about becoming Empress of the Universe so I can relate.