Absolut Insanity

If Diane Schuler wasn't already dead I'd kill her.

She drank herself witless and then got behind the wheel of a minivan with her three nieces, her son and daughter inside. Then she drove the wrong way on the Taconic State Parkway crashing head-on into an SUV, killing all three passengers.

And this was at 1:30 last Sunday afternoon.

The autopsy conducted by the Westchester County medical examiner’s office found about 6 grams of alcohol in Ms. Schuler’s stomach — alcohol that her body had not yet processed. The autopsy also found a “high level” — 113 nanograms per milliliter — of tetrahydrocannabinol, the main psychoactive substance in marijuana.

Ms. Schuler’s level of blood alcohol was equivalent to about 10 drinks — a drink being the equivalent of 12 ounces of beer, 4 ounces of wine, or an ounce and a half of 80-proof liquor.

How is it that nobody knew she was an alcoholic? Believe me, you can't ingest that much booze and still stand up let alone find the ignition if you're not used to abusing the sauce on a regular basis.

Allegedly she called her brother, the father of the three girls who were killed, and said she wasn't feeling well just before the accident. Well, shit, if I had half a bottle of Absolut in my stomach I'd feel pretty shitty too.