Boyd's Bears

Estimates are that polar bears will be practically extinct in another 50 years or so, but there are still some assholes who think they should be hunted.

A man named Boyd Warner has a company called Adventure Northwest out of Yellowknife, Canada and for $35,000 he will take you on a hunt for the beasts.

Says The Independent:

Earlier this week, the 45-year-old Canadian sent this season's first group of hunters north to Pond Inlet where they will track and kill up to six bears.

"This is probably the toughest hunt you can ever do," he said. "The weather conditions are appalling and it takes a huge amount of patience. You're living in the Arctic where it can drop to -50C at night and everything is done with sled dogs. It's incredibly gruelling."

So going on this hunt means you're a real man? Does your penis grow six inches or something? Seems to me in that cold, ain't nothin' much gonna grow.

"This year we have a lot of Mexicans and Americans but you get hunters from Europe, mainly Norwegians and Poles. They are just genuine, ordinary folk with a lot of cash. They respect the animals enormously."

Yeah, okay, Boyd, if that is your real name, I can't picture any self-respecting Mexican hunting polar bears, but if you say so. Oh, and by the way, I don't think shooting an animal is a good sign of respect.

Okay, so the Inuits actually use everything from a deceased polar bear except the liver because it's toxic. They are allowed to kill 20 bears, but says Mr. Warner:

"Those 20 bears are going to get killed one way or another because the Inuits depend on them for food during the winter," Mr Warner insisted. "So it shouldn't really matter whether it is the indigenous population that is shooting them or outsiders."

Well, Boyd, it really does matter and I think someone should be hunting you.