McCain Healthy as a Horse, Maybe 2 Horses

Senator John McCain (R, AZ) after being punched by doctor

Presidential hopeful, John McCain, has released his medical records for the last eight years to show he is in good health.

Despite the fact that he is older than dirt and has had three melanomas, the consensus is that he is strong as an ox but smells better.

To show just how much health and vigor he has, his physician socked him in the nose prior to a news conference.

"See? He pops right back up," said Dr. Knute Lavin. "Isn't that what you want in a presidential candidate?"