Victoria's Big Secret

Now here's a lesson for all you would-be shoplifters.

If you're going to enter a store to check things out, you know, and see if there's anything you'd like to take without paying for it, you should not be carrying a dead fetus around in your bag.

That seems so obvious, right?

Well, evidently not to 17-year-old Tiona Rodriguez of Bedford-Stuyvesant, Brooklyn, New York, USA, The World.

 No, there aren't bras in that sack.

Mommy Dearest

She went 'shopping' at a Victoria's Secret shop in Herald Square yesterday with a friend and they couldn't help themselves from taking some underlovelies.

A security guard ushered them into a back room where a vile odor was permeating the lightly fragranced lingerie seller's air.

That was when a dead male fetus was discovered wrapped in clothes and a black plastic bag and shoved into the bottom of another bag.

The lovely Tiona said she had gone into labor the day before and didn't know what to do.  That is patently ridiculous since she already has a two-year-old son who is perfectly healthy and lives with her and her madre.

A neighbor described her as a good girl.

Really?

Never mind that she can't keep herself from getting pregnant but she's a shoplifter.  

So far she and her buddy have been charged with petty larceny and criminal possession of stolen property.  Hopefully they'll come up with some other charges.