Poseidon Adventure

I don't know about you, but setting sail on a pseudo "Love Boat" has never appealed to me.

First of all, I don't like to be trapped somewhere for days at a time without a chance of escape. Yeah, yeah, I know these ships are large and luxurious, but let's face it. You can't get off any old time.

Secondly, entirely too many people get sick on these cruise ships. I don't want to be barfing from seasickness let alone some horrible viral infection.

And did you know that in the last two years a dozen people have "disappeared" on their cruises? That's right. Gone. If there's any sign of blood, the deckhands just swab it.

It sounds to me as if a cruise ship is perfect place to take someone you'd like to go missing and no one will question it.

Then there was the really smart captain who sailed his cruise ship right into a storm so that the damned thing practically capsized. I mean, what's up with this? It's the 21st century. Don't they have equipment to point out these potential problems?