News from the Bad Ass State

Florida seems to have more than its share of really interesting people.

Take Dale McDaniel. Please. And find him a nice comfy padded room somewhere.

By all accounts Dale is an angry guy and not at all a nice drunk. He's 52 years young and has been arrested approximately 34 times although maybe by now it's 35 times.

He pees all over his filthy yard and screams obscenities at his neighbors. He's also been known to physically assault them. One woman claims he grabbed her by the throat. Another person says McDaniel chased him with a chainsaw. And yet another neighbor, a quadriplegic, says Mr. McDaniel slapped him in the face with a fish.

Moving on to Daytona Beach from Port Richey, we stumble upon Sarah Cheek. Or maybe Ms. Cheek is the one doing the stumbling. She allegedly left her five year old daughter outside a bar in the rain at 10 pm one evening while she went in to the Crooks' Den to either get her a candy bar or look for a job. Probably neither as Ms. Cheek was in there slamming down a couple of beers. Concerned patrons called the cops on her, which was probably not what Ms. Cheek meant when she asked them to keep an eye on her kid.

And then in Orlando, home of Disney World, we find this chateau on wheels, a 1987 Cadillac deVille, in which a couple and their three kids were living.

Naturally they were arrested because that's what we do in this country when someone is poor. Being down on your luck and living in a Wal-Mart parking lot is a crime.

Is it really too late to saw Florida off the continental US?