Morbidly Short

You may have heard that Kevin Smith was tossed off a Southwest Airlines flight last week for being too fat. If you're too fat to safely fit into a seat you're considered a safety risk.

Kevin Smith makes movies that guys who live in their mother's basements with a lot of video games and Cheetos really like. I'm assuming that when Kevin isn't making movies or flying on airplanes he's eating.

I feel badly for Kevin because I understand his problem. It isn't that he's fat, he's too short.

He stands 5'9" tall and weighs (by any reasonable estimate) over 300 lbs. You add another foot of height to his stature and suddenly he's not morbidly obese. He could also find a job as an NFL defensive end but he'd have to lose the bathrobe and switch to a caftan.

I suggest we take a look at the problem we have in this country of so many being morbidly obese and reframe it. Let's just call it morbidly short. I think it's less threatening and a lot kinder.